009 - I can't go back to yesterday

[notdreaming]

[ Since learning what's going on with the network, Kara has changed into her ceremonial armor. If she's broadcasting to the multiverse, past present and future, she wants to be wearing her family crest when she does it. Her expression is hesitantly hopeful. ]

If there are any Kryptonians out there, please, I'd like to speak with you. I am Kara Zor-El, daughter of Alura and Zor-El, and I am very, very far from home.

[ Yeah that's all she's got for today. ]

Comments

[hetrustsme]

[A sigh] Which of the times? But- no, we just managed to turn the timeline right to where it should be.

[And lost Kon in the process.]

[notdreaming]

What? What does that mean?

[ That's a 'first time' answer. ]

[hetrustsme]

What does- ['What does that mean', he was about to say. But two and two = four.]

... I was always so bad at keeping things like these a secret. If you want me to explain I will? If your ship is outside of time me slipping won't really change things over here, will it?

[notdreaming]

I'm not sure how it works, but changing things is part of the deal here. Please explain it, Kal.

I thought... I thought I killed him.

[ And she loved him :c ]

[hetrustsme]

[Here goes nothing] You didn't kill him, even though you harmed him badly. There was this time portal, he ended... he ended back in Krypton, Kara. Before its destruction.

He changed the past so Krypton wouldn't die, but he also slaved the entire planet. Stopping him was [A motherfucking mess] difficult, but in the end we managed to fix the timeline... while Superboy sacrificed himself to save Argo City.

[notdreaming]

[ Her expression goes from confused to concerned, then shocked, then horrified. ]

He... what? But... but why?

[ They had made their peace here, however small and fleeting it may have been. She didn't want him dead. ]

[hetrustsme]

I wasn't there, but.. he wanted to prove he wasn't- [He finds his voice breaking, and he has to look down. This might be news to Kara, but Kal himself hadn't had yet time to mourn.

Or process the guilt, and it's now coming in waves.] To prove he wasn't just a weapon, to prove he had his own destiny. He made a choice that was his own.

[notdreaming]

[ Her hand covers her mouth as she tries to imagine it, what must have happened, a reality where Kon has sacrificed himself to save the world and is dead. Really, truly dead.

She was so jealous of him, she knows now. Her life had fallen apart and his was just starting. His genetics had been 'fixed' somehow, almost magically. He had friends, teachers, a place to belong, a place to go home to.

She gasps as a thought suddenly occurs to her. ]

No! Kal, he's fine! He was here, as a warden, like me. He met a girl here and went back to her world with her, and they got married. Rao bless, Kal, he isn't dead, he just left!

[hetrustsme]

-what?

[You've kind of lost him there. Not that he wouldn't grasp at Kryptonite straws to believe the kid still is alive somewhere but he's gotten quite a bit of a crash course on not buying thing that seem to good to be true.]

But you're from the past, you didn't even remember this. So obviously things in that place change nothing.

[notdreaming]

It's true. This place, it takes people from all different worlds and times. When we leave we're sent back to the moment we left. And the two of them, they said they had something worked out to travel between worlds. So they could have all of their friends at the wedding, or something like that.

[ If she was invited she doesn't know about it yet >:V ]

There's no way he's dead. He can't be.

[hetrustsme]

But I... [He frowns, reaching to pinch the bridge of his nose.]

He's dead here, Kara. I don't know if things are different in that ship of yours, and I'm glad he found someone he loves enough to marry with, but that won't bring him back here.

[notdreaming]

You don't know that.

[ Wow Kara why are you even trying to argue this. Kon only ever made things more complicated. ]

He's fine. He has to be. He and Stephanie are starting a family somewhere, and they're happy.

[hetrustsme]

Stephanie. [He repeats the name slowly, as if he had trouble processing it. It's not the name that bothers him, it's the whole idea of Kon living happily ever after with someone.

Is this a dream? Is this his subconcious dealing with the fact that the kid he treated like dirt when they met and basically ignored when he wanted nothing more than to live up to his reputation is dead? Either way he's tired of using logic to justify how this can't be.]

So he found... happiness. Are you happy in that place as well, Kara?

[notdreaming]

[ Is she happy? It's a strangely difficult question to answer. ]

I have friends here, and a chance to go home.

[ Happy is maybe pushing it a little. [

[hetrustsme]

[After the talk about Kon, that makes him smile.]

Sounds like you're on your way to happy to me. I wish I could come, see the place you're talking about. I can't, can I?

[notdreaming]

The Admiral has to offer you a job. Nobody can get on or off the boat without going through him. Because, you know, it's a prison.

There was a version of you here before, though. From an alternate universe. The one Kon went to, actually.